Page Layout and Synopsis ©1997 by Darcy Partridge

The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy

Episode 3.01

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Monica is dysfunctional because of her breakup with Richard. Joey can't stand having Janice around all the time; she invites him on a "day of fun" so they can get to know each other. Ross and Rachel talk about their fantasies; Rachel then tells Phoebe and Monica about Ross's Princess Leia fantasy. Phoebe and Mr. Gellar comfort Monica. Ross and Chandler share personal information, which leads to some unpleasant side effects for Ross.

The one where they said....

Rachel: No Way! The most romantic song ever was The Way We Were.
Phoebe: Uh, see, I... I think the one that Elton John wrote for, um, that guy on Who's The Boss.
Rachel: What song was that, Pheebs?
Phoebe (singing): Hold me close, young Tony Danza.

Ross: Yeah, she finally stopped crying yesterday, but then she found one of Richard's cigar butts out on the terrace....
Phoebe: Oh, okay, that explains it. I got a call at two in the morning, but all I could hear was, like, this high squeaky sound, so I thought, okay it's, like, a mouse or a possum. But then I realized, like, okay, where would a mouse or a possum get the money to make the phone call?

Janice (singing): Monica and Rachel had syrup, eh, eh, now I can get my man to cheer up.

Monica: What is wrong with me?
Ross: You need to get some sleep.
Monica: I need to get some Richard.

Rachel: Yes, Joey, I remember, she's annoying, but you know what? She's his girlfriend now. I mean what can we do?
Joey: There you go! There's the spirit I'm looking for! What can we do? Huh? Alright, who's first? Huh? Ross?
Ross: Well I'm thinking that Chandler's our friend and Janice makes him happy. So I say we all just be adult about it and accept her.
Joey: Yeah, we'll call that Plan B, alright?

Ross: Princess Leia was wearing this, um, gold bikini thing. It was pretty cool.

Rachel: Did you ever do the... the Leia thing?
Phoebe: Oh, yeah, uh-huh. Oh!
Rachel: Really! That... that great, huh?
Phoebe: No, it's just that I got this new pager and I have it on vibrate. See ya!

Joey: Wheel!
Chandler: Of!
Joey: Fortune! This guy is so stupid. It's Count Rushmore!
Chandler: You know, you should really go on this show.

Joey: It's like this chemical thing, you know. Every time she starts laughing, I just wanna... pull my arm off, just so I can have something to throw at her.
Chandler: Thanks for trying. Oh, and by the way--there is no Count Rushmore!
Joey: Yeah? Then... then who's the guy that painted the faces on the mountain?

Rachel: Okay, Ross, Phoebe is my girlfriend, okay? We tell each other everything. You know, I mean, come on! Guys do the same thing. I mean, what about that locker room stuff?
Ross: That's different, okay? That's like, uh, "who dated a stripper?" Or "who did it on the back of the Staton Island Ferry?"
Rachel: Both of those Joey?

Monica: I'm sorry, but that's my happy place.
Phoebe: Well, okay, fine. Use my happy place. Okay, I'm just... I'm gonna have to ask that you don't move anything in there.

Monica: Do you think breaking-up with him was a huge mistake?
Phoebe: Alright, there are no questions in the happy place. Okay? Just the warm breeze, and the moonlight flowing through the trees....
Monica: I'll bet he's totally over me. I'll bet he's fine.
Phoebe: Alright, betting and wagering of any kind are, I'm sure, not permitted in the happy place.

Joey: Does it have to be a whole day?
Janice: Yes, because that's how long it takes to love me.
Joey: Yeah, I know, I sleep in the next room.

Phoebe: Monica, do you want us to take you home?
Monica: Uh-huh. Or maybe to a galaxy far, far away.

Chandler: Okay. You know... you know when you're in bed. With a woman. And, uh, you know, you're fooling around with her. And you get all these, like, mental images in your brain, you know, like Elle MacPherson, or that girl at the Xerox place....
Ross: With the belly-button ring? Oh, mwaaa!
Chandler: I know! And then all of the sudden your Mom pops into your head. And you're like, "Mom, get outta here," you know, but of course, like, after that you can't possibly think of anything else, and you can't, you know, stop what you're doing. So it's kinda like, you're, you know... you know.... You don't know!
Ross: Your Mom? you're telling me... you're telling me about your Mom? What is the matter with you?
Chandler: You said...
Ross: I said, "share," not "scare!" Go sit over there!


Written by Michael Curtis and Gregory S. Malins
Directed by Gail Mancuso
Maggie Wheeler as Janice
Christina Pickles as Judy Geller
Elliott Gould as Jack Geller
Aired 9/19/96, 12/5/96