Phoebe: I just went to my old apartment to get you the... the cookie recipe and the stupid fire burned it up!
Monica: No! Why didn't you make a copy and... and keep it in a fireproof box, and keep it at least a hundred yards from the original?
Phoebe: Because I'm normal!
Monica: All right, I definitely taste nutmeg.
Phoebe: You do?
Monica: You don't? Well, that's the difference between a professional and a layman.
Phoebe: That, and arrogance.
Monica: Listen, I'm sure that Dad doesn't care. He probably thought that this was funny; he'll be telling this story for years!
Chandler: I don't want him to tell this story for years!
Ross: Oh, but he will. He still tells the story about how Monica tried to escape from fat camp.
Monica: I wasn't escaping!
Ross: Then how did you get caught in the barbed wire?
Monica: I was trying to help out a squirrel.
Ross: You were trying to eat it!
Chandler: If that is your father calling to tell this story then the marriage is off!
Monica [Answering phone]: Hello? I'm sorry, you have the wrong number. [Whispering:] Okay, I'll call you later, Dad. I love you.
Joey: You won't boss me around anymore?
Rachel: I won't boss you around.
Joey: And you'll be nice?
Rachel: And, I'll be nice.
Joey: And you'll be topless?
Rachel: And... Joey!
Joey: Do you want me to learn?
Rachel: No! No! No! I'm not yelling at you, I'm just yelling near you. Oh God, Joey! Oh, I'm my father. Oh my God, this is horrible! I've been trying so hard not to be my mother, I did not see this coming.