Friends
Page Layout and Synopsis ©2002 by Darcy Partridge

The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song

Episode 9.07

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Ross makes Emma laugh for the first time, by singing "Baby Got Back," which offends Rachel (until she finds she can't make Emma laugh any other way). Joey contemplates investing in an Emu farm, but Monica says he should invest in real estate, and suggests her ex-boyfriend Richard's apartment, which is up for sale. While Joey and Chandler look over Richard's apartment, Chandler finds (and steals) a video tape with Monica's name on it, worried about what might be on it. Chandler confirms that it's a sex tape, and Monica tries to calm him down, until she realizes that it's not her on the tape; then she's upset that Richard taped over her. Phoebe goes to dinner at Mike's parents place, and makes a terrible impression; but learns that Mike loves her.

The one where they said....

Monica: What do you do with your money now?
Joey: Well, it's taped to the back of my toilet tank.
[Then, realizing that people around can hear him:]
Joey: I didn't say that, it's, a, it's in a bank, guarded by robots!

Realtor: I think you guys would be very happy here!
Chandler: No, no, no, no. No! We're not together. We're not a couple, we're definately not a couple.
Realtor: Oh, okay. Sorry.
Joey: Wow, you seem pretty insulted by that. What, I'm not good enough for you?
Chandler: We're not going to have this conversation again.

Chandler: There's a tape here with Monica's name on it!
Joey: Oo, a tape with a girls name on it. Probably a sex tape! [Thinks a moment] Wait a minute! This says, "Monica." [Thinking more] And this is Richards apartment! [Still trying to put it all together]
Chandler: Get there faster!

Phoebe: I think you'd also like to know that he is a very gentle lover.
Mrs. Hanigan: Excuse me?
Oh, no, no, no, no. Don't get me wrong. Not in a sissy way. No, when he get's going, he can rattle a headboard like a sailor on leave!
Mrs. Hanigan: That's... my boy!

Monica [to Chandler]: That tape was never meant to be seen by you! [To Joey:] Joey, I would feel more comfortable if I was having this converstation in private.
Joey: Oh, Monica, look, I don't think you and I have any secrets anymore.


Credits

Written by Robert Carlock
Directed by Gary Halvorson
Paul Rudd as Mike Hanigan
Gregory Itzin as Mr. Theodore Hanigan
Christine Rose as Mrs. Bitsy Hanigan
Robin Krieger as The Realtor
Aired 11/14/2002, 2/20/2003, 7/3/2003, 10/16/2003