Phoebe finds a picture of her parents with their friend (also named Phoebe) and looks her up; she lives out by the beach, so everyone decides to go to the beach for the weekend. Rachel wears a big hat. Monica mourns her failed relationships, which prompts Chandler to offer to be her boyfriend "if worse comes to worst." Monica laughs, which prompts on-going efforts by Chandler to prove he's boyfriend material. Joey tries to initiate a strip-poker game, which ends up as a strip-Happy-Days game. Rachel and Ross flirt... until Ross's girlfriend Bonnie shows up. Phoebe finds out that the other Phoebe has no idea where her father Frank is... but she has a different revelation to make: She's Phoebe's mother. Rachel convinces Bonnie to shave her head again, which results in a confrontation between Rachel and Ross in which she reveals she still loves him. Ross must decide.
Monica: I'm never gonna find a boyfriend again. I'm gonna die an old maid.
Chandler: You're not gonna die an old maid. Maybe an old spinster cook.
Joey: Hey-hey, check out the hat!
Chandler: What a minute, I know that hat! I was taken aboard that hat! They did experiments on me! I can't have children!
Rachel: Well excuse me, my fashion-impaired friends, I am here to tell you that hats are back.
Phoebe: And this time they've ganged up to form one giant, super hat.
Rachel: Okay, who's next?
Ross: Nooo! No way!
Rachel: Come on, please? I'm bored! You let me do it once before.
Ross: Yeah, well if, uh, if that's the rule this weekend...
Monica: Strip-Happy-Days game?
Joey: Yeah, well, I couldn't find any cards, so it was either this or strip-bag-of-old-knitting-stuff.
Chandler: So, you still don't think I'm boyfriend material?
Chandler: I saw you checking me out during the game last night.
Monica: You didn't even take off your pants.
Chandler: Yeah, well, lucky for you.
Chandler: I don't know.
Phoebe Sr: But, um, you're right. I think that a person should know where they come from. Which is why I, uh, ah.... Okay. I'm your mother.
Phoebe Sr: You know, I wanted to tell you yesterday but I just, ya know... I felt all floopy, and...
Joey: So let me get this straight: If you go with Bonnie tonight,
you're doing the smart, healthy thing and moving on.
Joey: Right. And if you go with Rachel, Bonnie's free tonight?
Chandler: Hi! I'm Dorf, your date for the evening. Oh, come on! Dorf On Dating, that's good stuff!