Page Layout and Synopsis ©1997 by Darcy Partridge

The One Where Nana Dies Twice

Episode 1.08

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Chandler finds out a lot of people think he's gay when they first meet him; he tries to find out why. Paolo gives Rachel calls and shoes from Rome. Ross and Monica's grandmother dies... twice; At the funeral, Joey watches a football game on a portable TV; Ross falls into an open grave and hurts his back, then gets a bit loopy on muscle relaxers. Monica tries to deal with her mother's criticisms.

The one where they said....

Rachel: Well, I mean, when I first met you, ya know, I thought maybe, possibly, you might be...
Chandler: You did?
Rachel: Yeah, but then you spent Phoebe's entire birthday party talking to my breasts, so then I figured maybe not.
Chandler: Huh. Did, uh, any of the rest of you guys think that when you first met me?
Monica: I did.
Phoebe: Yeah, I think so, yeah.
Joey: Not me.
Ross: No no, me neither. Although, uh, ya know, back in college, Susan Sallidor did.
Chandler: You're kidding! Did you tell her I wasn't?
Ross: No. No, it's just 'cause, uh, I...I kinda wanted to go out with her too. So I, uh, told her, actually, you were seeing Bernie Spellman, who, uh... who also liked her, so...

Monica: Okay, I...I don't know. You... you just... you have a quality.
Everyone: Yeah. Absolutely. A quality.
Chandler: Oh, oh, a quality! Good, because I was worried you guys were gonna be vague about this.

Ross: So he's calling from Rome. I could do that. Just gotta go to Rome.

Ross: You know how, uh, the nurse said that... that Nana had... had passed? Well, she's not... quite....
Mrs. Geller: What?
Ross: She's not past... she's present, she's back.

Chandler: I just have to know, okay? Is it my hair?
Rachel: Yes, Chandler, that's exactly what it is. It's your hair.
Phoebe: Yeah, you have homosexual hair.

Phoebe: No, I mean maybe no one ever really goes. Ever since my mom died, every now and then, I get this feeling that she's, like, right here, you know? Oh! And Debbie--my best friend from junior high--got struck by lightning on a miniature golf course. I always get this really strong Debbie vibe whenever I use one of those little yellow pencils, ya know? I miss her.

Mr. Geller: I wanna be buried at sea, it looks like fun.
Monica: Define 'fun.'
Mr. Geller: C'mon, you'll make a day of it! You'll get a boat, pack a lunch...
Monica: ...And then we'll throw your body in the water. Gee, that does sound fun.
Mr. Geller: Everyone thinks they know me. Everyone says, 'Jack Geller: so predictable.' Maybe after I'm gone they'll say, 'Buried at sea! Huh!'
Monica: That's probably what they'll say.
Mr. Geller: I'd like that.

Monica: So mom already called this morning to remind me not to wear my hair up. Did you know my ears are not my best feature?
Ross: Some days it's all I can think about.

Chandler: Well, don't we look nice all dressed up? ...It's stuff like that, isn't it?

Ross: I feel great. I feel... great. I fleel great.
Monica: Wow, those pills really worked, huh.
Ross: Not the first two, but the second two... woooo! I love you guys. You guys are the greatest. I love my sister, I love Pheebs...
Phoebe: Oh! That's so nice.
Ross: Hey Chandler!
Chandler: Hey.
Ross: I love you, man. And listen, man, if you wanna be gay, be gay. Doesn't matter to me.
Andrea (to her friend): You were right!

Chandler: So you don't think I have a... a quality?
Lowell: Speaking for my people, I'd have to say... no. By the way, your friend Brian from Payroll... he is.
Chandler: He is?
Lowell: Yep, and way out of your league.
Chandler: Out of my league. I could get a Brian. [Brian enters behind Chandler.] If I wanted to get a Brian, I could get a Brian. [Chandler sees him.] Hey, Brian.


Written by Marta Kauffman and David Crane
Directed by James Burrows
Christina Pickles as Judy Geller
Elinor Donahue as Aunt Lillian
Nancy Cassaro as Shelly
Stuart Fratkin as Lowell
Elliott Gould as Jack Geller
Carolyn Lowery as Andrea
Marilyn Tokuda as Nurse
Aired 11/10/94, 12/27/94, 6/22/95