Chandler and Joey meet Ursula, Phoebe's twin sister; Joey begins dating Ursula, but that bothers Phoebe, who doesn't get along with her sister very well. Ross attends Lamaze class with Carol and Susan; Carol isn't sure she can go through with the delivery; Ross realizes he's really going to be a father. Chandler can't bear to fire an employee he's attracted to, so he starts to date her and tells everyone else she's mentally unbalanced, so it isn't safe to fire her; she begins to notice people treating her oddly, so Chandler has to come clean. Ross has trouble controlling his monkey, Marcel, who switches Monica's TV into Spanish mode; no one can figure out how to switch it back. Mr. Heckles could have cats. Jamie and Fran (from Mad About You) make an appearance in Central Perk. Rachel finally gets around to taking down the Christmas lights, but falls off the balcony in the process, and ends up hanging upside down outside Mr. Heckles' window.
Chandler: I was just going over your data here, and--little thing--you've been post-dating your Friday numbers.
Nina: Which is bad because...?
Chandler: Well, it throws my WENUS out of whack.
Nina: Your... excuse me?
Chandler: WENUS. Weekly Estimated Net Usage...
Nina: Oh... ...Net Usage Statistics. Right, gotcha. It won't happen again. I wouldn't want to do anything to hurt your...WENUS.
Rachel: Oh, cool. "Urkel" in Spanish, is "Urkel".
Joey: Pheebs? You think it would be ok if I asked out your sister?
Phoebe: Why? Why would you wanna do that? Why?
Joey: So that if we went out on a date, she'd be there.
Chandler: Mr. D, how's it going, sir?
Mr. Douglas: It's been better. The Annual Net Usage Statistics are in.
Mr. Douglas: It's pretty ugly. We haven't seen an ANUS this bad since the seventies.
Rachel: Are you seeing her again tonight?
Joey: Yep--Ice Capades.
Chandler: Wow, this is serious. I've never known you to pay money for any kind of capade.
Ross: Carol, honey? Shh, everything's gonna be all right.
Carol: What do you know? No one's going up to you and saying, "Hi. Is that your nostril? Mind if we push this pot roast through it?"
Nina: For the past couple of days, people have been avoiding me and giving me these really strange looks.
Chandler: Oh, well, uh, maybe that's because they're, uh, jealous of us.
Nina: Maybe. But that doesn't explain why they keep taking my scissors.